The church bulletin was a bit lacking in detail. In simple Times New Roman font it said that on Sunday, Aug. 5, Agape would be leading the church service. Who? Why? What’s an Agape? Upon arrival at the lakeside summer service I immediately noted the recorded music was a bit livelier than usual. Not that a “normal” service offers dark… Read More

  “That’s a bit excessive, don’t you think?” I turned to see who was talking to me and came face to face with a rather irate woman seemingly built to withstand windstorms. Her short grey hair and steely eyes made me want to stand a bit taller lest she knock me down with yet another withering stare. Okay, so I… Read More

  Miss Manners’ topic of the day was the stress of “monster showers.” A reader wrote saying she felt it was appropriate–not tacky– for the family to host a wedding shower for the bride-to-be since the cost of being a bridesmaid was skyrocketing. I’m paraphrasing the intent and content of the column, but the essence was disturbingly based on modern… Read More

  My husband is cute. Physically, verbally, romantically. He’s also delightfully ignorant of many common expressions. My son and I love to recite movie quotes when joking around or making an insider reference. When we mention something is so good it goes all the way to eleven (Spinal Tap reference), my husband looks at me with confusion. “Eleven what?” “Never… Read More

  Even Minnesota, that great “fly over” state most people not from here equate to the movie, Fargo, has been searingly hot. A slow and lengthy stretch of days in the upper nineties has shocked us to the point of muttering “uffda,” and meaning it. With days this hot it is hard to feel motivated to get outside and do… Read More

          Hot women…                                                                                   Tiny beads of water ran down the pitcher and pooled on the table. I knew that. I saw that. And yet, when I picked up the pitcher to pour a glass of mint-infused lemonade, a generous amount of condensation landed on my shirt and erased the polished look I was going for. Wet… Read More

  Stepping off the whitewashed fence post was always thrilling. As a girl, I loved to test my focus and balance by walking on top the board fences that outlined my family’s farm. The first few steps were usually the easiest because the board was securely anchored to the fencepost and therefore didn’t wobble much. As I made my way towards… Read More

The black stallion beneath me tossed his head and gazed over the rocky outcropping. Forty feet below a shallow pool of water glittered with pink and orange diamonds reflecting from the fading sunset. At least from my vantage the water appeared to be shallow. My daughter and son, only three and seven respectively, watched from a safe distance with little… Read More

“According to MapQuest Panera Bread should be right here.”  My daughter slowed her Subaru and we looked to our right. We looked to our left. No Panera Bread.  I grabbed my GPS unit and punched in the address. The assured female voice of the GPS told us to turn, to turn, to turn. We did. Walla. We were right back… Read More

  My husband was making noises in the bathroom that filtered through my consciousness and caused me to wake. No, not those kind of noises, these were the sounds of a man tapping his three-bladed razor on the sink edge while a trickle of water splashed into the basin. Let’s see, morning + husband getting ready for work = a… Read More

The police vehicle was perched on the side of the road like a cat about to pounce. Immediately I did what every red-blooded American does…I glanced at my speedometer because I had no clue how fast I had been driving. Dang, dang, dang. I was doing about sixty-three in a fifty-five mile per hour stretch of road. I looked into… Read More

Dianne had a certain look in her eye. She’d been shepherding and essentially babysitting our group around Tibet for two weeks, and as a result we had effectively managed to fray her last nerve. Our location at the time was Kangding, a surprisingly large city located in a valley of the Tibetan Plateau. Dianne put her hands on her hips…. Read More

If cars could have leprosy my daughter’s car, lovingly known as “Chip,” has had it for the past ten or twelve years. Chip is a 1996 Chevy Corsica.  Poor Chip had one of those unfortunate paint jobs where the primer didn’t do what it was supposed to do, and the paint sloughed off over time. (By the way, shame on GM… Read More

The man stepped down from his truck cab, lifted his baseball cap, and scratched his forehead. Huh. How was he going to squeeze a very large septic-pumping truck through an very small space? Let me explain … Several days prior to the septic truck’s arrival on our yard, my husband borrowed my ex-husband’s trailer. What has one to do with… Read More

The word, “Amen,” came immediately to mind. Last week a friend sent me a forward that I thought was too good to let fade away. I’ve already sent it on to many of my friends, but wanted to post it here as well. Part of aging successfully is staying aware of politics. It is not a subject most love to… Read More

The minister was scrolling through his iPad to find the next portion of the Sunday service. As an old-school Lutheran hearing sermons thundering from technology’s prompts makes me tilt my head and wondering where we are headed in the future. Will we have a chip inserted under our skin that will infuse our brains with lectures on moral behavior? Will… Read More

I was lucky enough to be raised by parents who mostly withheld their opinions unless asked. As a child it was different of course, and lessons concerning right and wrong occurred on a daily bases. “Share with each other!” “Stop teasing your brother.” “Play fair.” “Take all you want to eat, but eat all you take.” “Don’t waste.” “Respect your… Read More

This morning a classmate sent out a web address relating to a woman named Samantha Brick. Samantha laments her life because she is too beautiful. Other women cannot relate to her, and men swarm all over themselves to catch her attention. Here is the web address if you’d like to read her story directly: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2124246/Samantha-Brick-downsides-looking-pretty-Why-women-hate-beautiful.html In my sex and gender… Read More

As a great cartoon character once said, “Doh!” Okay, maybe he said it about a couple of zillion times, but that lends strength and recognition to the outcry. The past few weeks I’ve been feeling layers of emotions as my college semester winds down. There’s the joy of learning, and while that may sound like a suck-up statement, I’m serious…. Read More

The glossy stack of magazines beckoned. I was in the reception area of a nutritional clinic waiting for my husband to finish his appointment, and time was dragging. My hands held a thick collection of required reading for one of my college classes. The content was littered with academic speak so dry and creatively parched that I had to wet… Read More

“Cate Blanchett goes sans Photoshop for magazine cover,” the headline read. I don’t know if the link will carry over but here it is if you want to read the story without my musings: http://thelook.today.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2012/03/21/10796953-cate-blanchett-goes-sans-photoshop-for-magazine-cover. I love stories like hers for a number of reasons: 1. That this is something so unusual it gets a story. 2. That at the… Read More

“Many of us have our memories of being sort of shut out of gyms and playgrounds and whatever. But back then, we didn’t really grumble about it. Like an awful lot of things that happened to young women at the time, that was just the way it was. We hadn’t gotten to the point where we started complaining that maybe… Read More

“Marriage accustomed one to the good things, so one came to take them for granted, but magnified the bad things, so they came to feel as painful as a grain in one’s eye. An open window, a forgotten quart of milk, a TV set left blaring, socks on the bathroom floor could become occasions for incredible rage. And something happened… Read More

I could feel the tufted white satin lining as my fingers searched for an opening, searched for a chance to escape. Nothing made sense. It was so dark I’d lost my bearings. Was I right side up or face down? My balance said I was slightly vertical, but that didn’t seem possible. Kicking and screaming served no purpose other than… Read More

Angelina Jolie approaches the microphone, juts out her hip, and poses her leg through the thigh-high slit of her black velvet evening gown. My husband gives an appreciative sigh. “I like her dress,” he said with a glazed expression and just a hint of drool. Truth be told, I liked it too. Although she seems concerningly thin these days, Angelina… Read More

The boar-bristled brush grumbled through the mess known as my hair with a minimum of pain on this bed-head morning. Looking at myself in the mirror with a resigned shrug, I pulled the somewhat tamed tresses into a haphazard ponytail and called it good enough. A little lipstick, a caress of brown eye-shadow, and a dusting of powder on my… Read More

The exasperated father turns to his adult sons and says, “Fine. Because I retired today, the two of you can physically wrestle here and now for the company and for the house. Winner takes all.” The mother, listening in disbelief, snorts her disapproval because she wants both privileged sons—who are living at home and unemployed—to take the reins of the… Read More

In the syndicated cartoon “Zits” by Jerry Scott and Jim Borgman the challenges of raising a teenage son in modern society echoes the challenges of generations past. Be it a room so messy the closet and bed are lost in the clutter, responsibility side-steps, or bewildering social behaviors, parents and child continue to grow within the relationship. Once in awhile… Read More

It’s only about six inches across, and has the blackened bumpy texture only decades of use creates. If needed, it can make a delectable hot breakfast or be wielded as a formidable weapon. (I’m just guessing on the weapon thing in case you were wondering. Honest.) The heft of the old cast iron frying pan requires respect when handling…not unlike… Read More

Just saying the word “stiletto” brings to mind all things wanton and sexy. It sort of hisses off the tongue and ends with the “ooooo” of a kissing pucker. Even a good girl can teeter on the brink of naughty when she puts on a pair of stiletto shoes or boots. Think of it as attitude by the foot. Yesterday… Read More