Can you hear it? Floaty strains from The Godfather theme song? There’s beauty trembling with fear in each note. Who’s going to die in some bloody horrible way just as s/he lets fly with a snarky one-liner or haughty “go to hell†laugh? I mention this because I think our cat, Pudgy, is in the mob. And not just in… Read More
Moon Pause, Part 5: Sex And The Aging Woman
“An older woman looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women or drag queens. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, an older woman is far sexier than her younger counterpart. Her libido’s stronger, her fear of pregnancy gone. Her experience of lovemaking is honed and reciprocal and she’s lived long enough to know… Read More
Love Letter To My Husband: He Who Puts The “Man†in Midlife RoMANtic
“Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.” — Richard Jeni Dear Tad, This morning I woke to the sounds of your soft breathing. The peach-colored stubborn winter sunrise kissed your face, and made me want to kiss it too. Beneath the tumble of blankets—the ones I toss upon you during the night when… Read More
Valentine Cooties: How Do You Feel About The Day Now That You Are In Midlife?
“Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.” — Unknown U R a QT! Bee My Valentine? The box of pre-cut Valentine’s Day cards spewed across the table, and I was in a bad mood. Mom had made the purchasing decision, and clearly she did NOT understand second-grade relationship rules. How could I stuff a card that said, I choo-choo-choose… Read More
Moon Pause (Menopause), Part 4:
“You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.” –Woody Allen Common Symptoms That Enhance Our Swearing Vocabulary Headaches (Not tonight, Dear) According to a symposium held to discuss the correlation between migraine headaches and menopause, women have up to five times as many migraine… Read More
Sex, Drugs, and Rock N’ Roll… Have Nothing To Do With This Blog
Mother Nature had a bad case of dandruff yesterday and left us with more white flakes than promised by our local meteorologists. I admit it irks me when I tune into a weather report, base my day on the information the computer “models†give, and then ka-blewee. Either we get nary a whiff of precipitation, or we get the mother… Read More
Midlife Masks: Are You Wearing Other People’s Faces?
Lynne Klippel’s question was direct. “How have wearing other people’s faces served you?†In my introverted, I-don’t-like-sharing-my-inner-feelings way, I froze for a second. I know I do put on masks, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to dissect the reasons. Particularly midlife masks. Sometimes mucking about in my inner-workings, my subconscious, is like realizing I’ve been living a hoarder’s lifestyle…. Read More
Moon-Pause, Part 3: Fat Chance of Staying Thin!
The American standard of beauty demands women appear slender. Constant media onslaughts display happy, sexy, glamorous women who are a size 0-2, and ridicule anyone breaking free of the cultural “rulesâ€. Oh sure, once in a rare while a female celebrity will have the nerve to show her face in public, smiling, proud of her Aphrodite curves.  No, no, no!… Read More
Midlife Seduction: Misses With The Mrs.
“You have to know that an older man cannot hang from a chandelier.” –Dr. Ruth “It’s a great way to save water,†said my husband. It was, and is, his not so subtle way of saying he’d love it if I’d take a shower with him. And yet, somewhere along the way, the sexiness of lathering up together has lost its… Read More
The Minimalist Guide to Smiling in Midlife
 “Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.†–Winnie the Pooh So Minimal, In Fact, That If My List Were Clothing You’d Be Reading This On A Nude Beach When was the last time you lost it? Not in a bad, “I’m going to kick holes in the wall because I’m angry, and this wallpaper needs to go†sort of way… Read More
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